Seasons greetings from Zombieland

Seasons greetings from Zombieland

We’ve read this several times and are still not certain what to make of it. Here, you have a look, then we’ll compare notes.

Subject: Compliment Of The Season !!

From: JOHN MORGAN
Date Sent: 2/15/2011 7:50:20 AM

I AM MR JOHN MORGAN.I OWNED TWO OIL WELL AND ONE REFINERY.i am married to MRS HELEN MORGAN. She works with the UNITED NATIONS GOVERMENT.

I buy your guts and courage to be more conscious when it come’s to case like this, it is normal you get protective over such issue as you never knows how real it is.

I am a reputable man of high and international standard, it will be so discrediting to my credibility if this was a scam or what so ever you call it.It is a shame today that so many people have them self involve in such barbaric attitude but am happy that i am a legitimate business man and clean minded and also have the fear of God in what so ever am doing in life.

The Almighty lord do not create me out to this world to cheat or deceive people of interest out of their money so i will reject been such ever in my life.I am a knight in my church I worship as a good Christian, if i had ever thought of scamming people i think God would not have elevated me to this standard which i am now.

I PARTNERED WITH MICROSOFT INTERNET FOR AN INVESTMENT PROGRAMME WHICH WAS VERY SUCCESFULL AND PROSPERIOUS.I HAVE TO SHOW GRATITUDE TO MICROSOFT INTERNET, SO IDECIDED TO COMPENSATE MICROSOFT INTERNET LUCKY WINNER WITH THE SUM OF 900,000 UNITED STATE DOLLARS TO ENCOURAGE PEOPLE TO USED THE INTERNET DAILY. I AM CURRENTLY IN PARAGUAY FOR ANOTHER INVESTMENT PROJECT. IT WAS MADE EASY AND SUCCESFULL WITH THE HELP OF MICROSOFT INTERNET.

Due to your effort, using the internet programs indoor and in your office,I want to compensate you and show microsoft gratitude to youwith the sum of $900,000 dollars ( NINE Hundred Thousand United States Of America Dollars) because your email address emerge as one of the lucky winners to be compensated.

After this automated computer ballot, your e-mail address emerged as a winner in the category “A” with the following numbers attached Ref Number: EH 9590 OGSO.I have authorized the finance house where I deposited my money to issue you international certified bank draft cashable at your bank. assist your in getting your compensation check across to you.

It is a real your cheque and you can cash it in any bank of your choice in your country. The cheque has been put under a hard cover parcel for security reasons.

CONTACT COMPENSATION AND FINANCE HOUSE FOR YOUR CHEQUE OF 900,000 DOLLARS.

EMAIL: revedwinthompson1@yahoo.co.jp
NAME; Rev Edwin Thompson
CELL PHONE: +234-703-353-8101

My sincere advice to you as a christian is that you should endeavour to pay your tithe to a bible believing church when you get the prize and try to help the less previledge ones in your country, by donating to the orphanage homes.

YOURS SINCERELY
JOHN MORGAN

Well, did you have any more luck than we did, or did it seem to be a strange hodge-podge to you as well? Mr. Morgan has managed to include bits and pieces from all sorts of different themes, yet each points to the same conclusion.

This is probably a Fraud.

Subject: Compliment Of The Season !!

Mr. Morgan is very excited about the season, too bad he wasn’t a bit clearer as to what season it was that has him so whipped up.

From: JOHN MORGAN
Date Sent: 2/15/2011 7:50:20 AM

I AM MR JOHN MORGAN.I OWNED TWO OIL WELL AND ONE REFINERY.i am married to MRS HELEN MORGAN. She works with the UNITED NATIONS GOVERMENT.

He owned two oil wells and a refinery, very impressive. Mrs. Morgan seems impressive in her own right as well and yet the simple operation of the Shift and Caps lock keys seem to elude his grasp. A shame really. So far, we’ve had puffery and the United Nations brought into play.

I buy your guts and courage to be more conscious when it come’s to case like this, it is normal you get protective over such issue as you never knows how real it is.

We do not understand how buying our guts, which we are loath to part with, and our courage will make Mr. Morgan more conscious, unless he’s a flesh-eating Zombie.

As far as being overprotective of our guts, that just goes without saying. We needn’t see them to ascertain the reality of them.

Sorry but, we draw the line at doing business with flesh-eating Zombies.

I am a reputable man of high and international standard, it will be so discrediting to my credibility if this was a scam or what so ever you call it.It is a shame today that so many people have them self involve in such barbaric attitude but am happy that i am a legitimate business man and clean minded and also have the fear of God in what so ever am doing in life.

We return here to some more classic themes, feigned indignation at the suggestion of fraud; another round of personal puffery and the self-righteous piety of a God-fearing man. Pretty defensive material for a flesh-eating Zombie.

The Almighty lord do not create me out to this world to cheat or deceive people of interest out of their money so i will reject been such ever in my life.I am a knight in my church I worship as a good Christian, if i had ever thought of scamming people i think God would not have elevated me to this standard which i am now.

Mr. Morgan, how someone with your command of the language has not several Pulitzers is beyond us. 

What church do you belong to that has knights, sounds much more exciting than ours. Do you have jousting contests at mass or are they saved for high holy days?

I PARTNERED WITH MICROSOFT INTERNET FOR AN INVESTMENT PROGRAMME WHICH WAS VERY SUCCESFULL AND PROSPERIOUS.I HAVE TO SHOW GRATITUDE TO MICROSOFT INTERNET, SO IDECIDED TO COMPENSATE MICROSOFT INTERNET LUCKY WINNER WITH THE SUM OF 900,000 UNITED STATE DOLLARS TO ENCOURAGE PEOPLE TO USED THE INTERNET DAILY. I AM CURRENTLY IN PARAGUAY FOR ANOTHER INVESTMENT PROJECT. IT WAS MADE EASY AND SUCCESFULL WITH THE HELP OF MICROSOFT INTERNET.

Oh dear, another Cap-lock malfunction as well as the gratuitous Microsoft mention. As far as encouraging people to use the internet daily, Facebook, Twitter and silly cat pictures pretty much have that covered and they make money, not spend it. Your business acumen seems somewhat lacking. How did you get the oil wells and refinery, inheritances?

Due to your effort, using the internet programs indoor and in your office,I want to compensate you and show microsoft gratitude to youwith the sum of $900,000 dollars ( NINE Hundred Thousand United States Of America Dollars) because your email address emerge as one of the lucky winners to be compensated.

We do occasionally use an Ipad outdoors That doesn’t affect out eligibility, does it?

After this automated computer ballot, your e-mail address emerged as a winner in the category “A” with the following numbers attached Ref Number: EH 9590 OGSO.I have authorized the finance house where I deposited my money to issue you international certified bank draft cashable at your bank. assist your in getting your compensation check across to you.

Mr Morgan, please. You own two oils wells and a refinery. You are married to a woman who has an important position in the United Nations government. You’re a knight at your church. You have amassed a fortune and gotten Microsoft to do a joint venture with you. Are you saying that you can’t figure out how to work an envelope and a postage stamp?

Really, what are we to think?

It is a real your cheque and you can cash it in any bank of your choice in your country. The cheque has been put under a hard cover parcel for security reasons.

We have no idea what a hard cover parcel is. We suppose, perhaps, that the check is in need of a Zero Halliburton type of case. Maybe the check is printed on very thin glass. It that a thinly disguised Italian accent that we detect?

CONTACT COMPENSATION AND FINANCE HOUSE FOR YOUR CHEQUE OF 900,000 DOLLARS.

EMAIL: revedwinthompson1@yahoo.co.jp
NAME; Rev Edwin Thompson
CELL PHONE: +234-703-353-8101

We are to contact Compensation and Finance House’s representative, who is a priest or minister with a Japanese email address and a Nigerian telephone. Sounds perfectly reasonable to us.

My sincere advice to you as a christian is that you should endeavour to pay your tithe to a bible believing church when you get the prize and try to help the less previledge ones in your country, by donating to the orphanage homes.

Sorry, we belong to the Church of Latter Day Edsel Hubcap Salesmen, we don’t use the bible. We use the JC Whitney catalog and we don’t tithe.

YOURS SINCERELY
JOHN MORGAN

Well, overall Mr Morgan, we feel that you have failed to make your case in a believable manner. We will grant that you made an effort, but if was not a good effort. We are sure you could do better if you at least proofread your work. We feel that you have sent us a rough first draft.

Sorry, Mr. Morgan, but the verdict is unanimous.

This is a Fraud.

Join us next time for “No experience (or intelligence) required” here at HowToSpotAFraud.com.

That is all.

Advertisements
This entry was posted in Email fraud, Humor, Sarcasm and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s